Today My Heart Is Aching

"Have you ever been hurt and the place tries to heal a bit, and you just pull the scar off of it over and over again?" 

Courtesy of Rosa Parks

This is how I feel today. I thought I was ok...I thought I could handle it...I thought I was ready for rejection...But alas, I was not and I "pulled the scar off" again.

I beat myself up over past and present sin pretty frequently...It is bad and a sin. It is one that I have struggled with for a very long time. Kalan has been very instrumental in helping me to deal with the grief and heart ache that I put myself through and I am very thankful that God has given me to Kalan!

Today I just want to crawl under a rock and cry but my God is strong and through Him I am strong! Thank you Lord for your faithfulness to me! I am so unworthy but You still love me!

I have been living by the following verse for about 2 1/2 years and it is more personal now than it was then.

Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."

Sorry for all of the "doom and gloom" today but I really want to be real with all of you and being sad is part of life! On to more happy news! Tonight I am going to a PAR-TAY! I am so stinkin' excited to sit and talk with a family that I have not really hung out with since I got married! So look forward to pictures tomorrow about good food and friends!